In the back of my mind

It’s always in the back of my mind
Always there never out of sight
And that is why, I am writing this poetry
So that I can release my emotions quietly.

I am always found of rhythms and prose
Sometimes I am stuck, sometimes I am nonstop
For I can’t hide the feeling in the back of my mind.
That in no time, I am ready to grind.

Why can’t I believe the assurance of my love?
Why I always doubted everything. Everytime?
Why can’t I be as peaceful as dove
That sways in the swamp from time to time…

Maybe I am born like this.
Born to be a realist
Never believe up until she saw
The evidence she always try to draw.

Photo by: Pinterest

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What if?

A girl wonders if she deserves to have a child
She’s scared of what the future can bring
Because even she was still a teen
She’s acting like a bold face queen

She go parties all night long
Enjoy with his boyfriend as he sing her a song…
Then begin scaring herself.
Of all the what if? They’ve done from themselves.

What if she got pregnant and lost?
Left with nothingness…
But then again, all what she think is abortion
Because she never wanted her life to crumbles…

But then again, conscience hit her!
Am I really deserving to have a child in the future?
For just thinking of abortion is already a sin.
Even the thing she’s scared is not yet happening.

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Quarantine Love

My heart flutters whenever you call
Telling stories, making jokes that has no sense at all
Mking me feel love and cared
For every second, minute, hour and days we shared

Though its quarantine and we barely see each other
Our love will never stop like a shutter
Exchanging good morning and goodnight
Till our eyes wide open and fall out of sight

I love you, thats all I can say
Because a time with you always complete my day
My love—-please dont change
Because a life without you is meaningless and bare

Photo by: Psychology Today

Magical

I met you at a very unexpected hours of my day
When I cry in whole class with nothing to say
Then you suddenly bring happiness,joy and laughter
That I wish it was forever…

You are a wish granted from the above
A friend whose very supportive and give so much love
A brother whom I can exchange clap with both hands
Taking photos even you shawl and fall into the land

But just like every plot twist in a movie…
You enter as a sweet dreams but left me in my nightmares
You left me in nothingness that I felt so scared
And the time you come back. I move back and flared

Sorry, I was not brave enough to forget and forgive .
Because that time it was so hard to believe…
That the fireworks that give sparks in my eyes.
Suddenly lost into the unknown of darkness.

Wasted

The next time you asked for help
And ignore the person who volunteer herself
Just so you can dwell to it easily
Because your important to her lavishly

Thats why you take her for granted
Hang her there whenever you wanted
And used her whenever you needed
As if she owes you the world you never founded

It may be okay for sometime…
But it will not work everytime
Because she is a human too..
That will give you what you want in a count of two.

She gets tired for being unappreciated
Because doing a thing for  the person whose not deserving
Putting all your efforts in that kind of a thing
Is a time wasted… Wasted.

It’s not as if, I want something in return
It’s that I just want to hear some thank you
To the person whom I not own a penny or turn…
To the person that initiate to ask for help and that is you…

Photo by:uhhospital.org

Open Letter to myself 10 years ago

Hello, I am you. I have seen your future and hope you can receive this too… So I can give you some sorts of inspiration and motivation to never doubt yourself. For I know, that eventually you will feel tired for being unappreciated.

You will feel tired because at the peak of your sucess you will realized that at the end, no matter how far you achieved something. You will never be the apple of there eye. I know its hard to accept, but that’s how life goes in and you need to accept that in this world nothing is fair.

I am not writing this too discourage you as it sound of but please… Do the things that really makes you happy. Strive to the things that you really line and not just to please others. Think of yourself above all else,for I know that you are selfless. Never be too good to people for they wull abuse you. Learn to stand and fight for what you believe in because many believes in you and hope you do it too.. Never underestimate yourseld because you are the most selfless, genuine, humble girl I am cherish to met.

Love,
Yourself.

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